Are teachers emotionless? Should they be? As I search my memory I can't seem to remember many instances where teachers showed emotions; other than anger, concern or disappointment. This isn't to say I didn't have fabulous educators because I have mentioned before how proud I am to have had the opportunity to be educated in Massillon, Ohio in The Perry Local Schools district. (yes, apparently "The" is officially capitalized there) When did it become wrong to show emotion as a teacher? Is it still? How will my students ever be convinced that I am human if I am never anything but complacent, angry, or concerned? What happens when a teacher cries?
Today my small school took a field trip to the neighboring, big school's Veteran's Day program. It is one of the larger attended programs in the state of Montana. I'll be honest when I say that I was only half enthusiastic to go. Perhaps, it was because of hearing other teachers complain about missing more class time, or that the students only wanted to go to miss class and expressed very little care about the program itself. I sat on the fence, but knew I needed to attend. Moments before I loaded onto the bus I glanced at my cell phone and saw a message from a dear friend expressing her sympathy to me regarding the loss of my father. It was ten years ago today that he passed away unexpectantly...a Veteran of the Army, but also a husband, a father, and a friend to many. It's been ten years and I have since found ways to stifle my emotions, but a sinking feeling settled into my stomach as I walked out of school. In passing, a fellow teacher remarked that she didn't want to go because she didn't enjoy crying in public and I paused to wonder if I too would have to hold back tears.
By nature, I am an emotional person. Could that be my flaw as an educator? I've found myself tear up while reading student's papers, or when they confide in me how awful their day was going. Recently, after having a conversation with a parent I found myself crying all of the way home for their family. Are tears my weakness, or do they give me an edge that others don't have?
The Veteran's Day program was lovely. It was a mixture of songs, music, recognition, and speakers. I think what really got to me was listening to the speakers, who were a variety of ages, tell about their experiences. I began to think about my students and wonder if they understood the brevity of these matters. Two junior high boys sitting beside me continued to be disrespectful, rude, and talkative throughout the program. Although I was angry (standard teacher emotion), I also felt sad that they didn't have enough maturity or respect to pay attention and honor our Veterans. I couldn't hold back my tears. My eyes swelled and a single, salty drop streamed down my cheek. I brushed my hair into my eyes and sunk my head into my scarf. I glanced across the bleachers and caught sight of another teacher who was also showing emotion. Gasp! Two teachers with stained, red faces?
The program didn't get any easier. I found myself sinking into my emotions and really feeling every word the Veterans spoke. I thought of my father, my brother, my close friend Ray, my girlfriend's husband, and all of the millions of soldiers I didn't know. A few of my students sat with solemn looks on their face, but not many and certainly not one shed a tear. Likewise, not a single student seemed to notice my emotions, or at least they didn't say anything or look my way. I think I would have avoided their glances.
What is wrong with the emotional teacher? What do you do when you're feeling sad? I can remember my assessment teacher in college telling us that one of her hardest days teaching the second grade was the morning after she lost a beloved dog. Her advice was to tell your students that you are sad and if you can, why you are sad. After she told her second graders about her passed pet they all began telling her stories about their pets and how they loved them. In the end, their bright, cheery little voices gave her the strength to keep moving forward. Another amazing teacher I met while at MSU told our capstone English Ed. class that she tells her students on the very first day that she will indeed cry in class if she is brought to tears and she won't hold it back. I hope my future students bring me to happy tears. I really believe that emotion should be welcome in he classroom. If I am to create a safe environment, then it needs to be an environment that is safe to experience and share emotion in.
My message to the future teachers of American, and to any teacher who has had to stifle a tear is to let it out...Don't be afraid to show your students who you really are. I'm not ashamed that some of my classes have seen my ridiculously silly side, or that they have made me laugh so hard that my face turned red and I could hardly speak. The more we show our students we aren't aliens, the more I believe they will respect us. Of course, I don't condone crying often, or becoming uncontrollably upset, but a tear shed in respect to a beautiful speech, a sad story, or the honoring of a service man or woman is nothing to be ashamed of. Although teachers set examples, we don't have to pretend to be someone we're not. We want our students to find themselves and be proud of who they are, so we should do the same. When I committed myself to teaching I didn't commit myself to being a robot educator, but one with compassion and energy.
I still have a heavy heart, but each one of my students is making it lighter. Maybe, just maybe they don't think I'm an alien. I love my job.
Friday, November 11, 2011
Thursday, October 27, 2011
A Temporary Silence
As I sit in the school library I find myself staring at two posters. One reads in big block letters, "Doing your best means never stop trying," and the other is an American flag with books instead of stars and the words "free to read" faded into the red stripes. I'm thinking about how just a few weeks ago I posted about the pride and enthusiasm my sophomore class exemplified in invigorating most of the students to recite The Pledge of Allegiance before class each morning, but since I have been silenced. Although I received much praise and kind words from my readers and community members who heard about this accomplishment, I also was ridiculed and reprimanded for inspiring such a "controversial topic."
Since, I have sat in silence, quietly abiding by the unwritten rules and policies, but have continued to be in constant reflection. One person told me that writing a blog was putting my future on the line and I could very well end up in the land of unemployable teachers. Apparently, I should have written my blog in secrecy because my commitment to the community I reside in has put my blogging in jeopardy. People said, "what if someone finds out you are writing about the school?" I'm not doing in anything wrong and I am certainly abiding by FERPA. My goal is not to write a gossip column and I'm not uploading my words onto the school website for all to speculate about who or what I'm talking about. My goal is, and always has been, to write about small town teaching and student teaching. I believe that we write best about what we care most about; this is it for me.
A few weeks after The Pledge was resurrected a teacher approached me and asked if I knew how the morning ritual resurfaced. At this point I was still weary of more retaliation and mentioned that it was the student's idea. I tried to gauge the reaction, but the inquisitive look left me unsure of what she was thinking. As the conversation continued I found out that only one classroom wasn't participating in reciting The Pledge because they didn't believe in it. Inside my heart sunk, but I kept a blank look on my face. I came to find out that the first period teacher told the students that they are being brainwashed by the government to recite The Pledge and they wholeheartedly believe it. Outrageous. It is true that I did not require any of the students to take part in this morning ritual, but my hopes were they would come to a conclusion on their own. It's funny...I get reprimanded for encouraging students and writing about it, but a teacher can spout their political views to students and no one cares. Is this the true face of education?
So, I'm back. I can't keep quiet. I won't go on pretending that every school system is perfect and there is nothing interesting to write about. So many people want change, but they don't want to hear about what needs changed or how it will happen. Read my blog if you want to hear about the triumphs and tribulations of entering into a volatile world of education, but if you can't accept or handle what I so passionately have to say then stop reading right now.
I haven't posted for a while, but I've kept a journal of all the crazy-wonderful-completely-ridiculous and horrifyingly-spectacular experience I've had so far. I am in my final two weeks of student teaching, but I will revisit the last 6 weeks and share with you what I've learned, struggled with, and hope to take away from this crazy experience...an experience that I plan on lasting for...oh, another 30 years or so.
Since, I have sat in silence, quietly abiding by the unwritten rules and policies, but have continued to be in constant reflection. One person told me that writing a blog was putting my future on the line and I could very well end up in the land of unemployable teachers. Apparently, I should have written my blog in secrecy because my commitment to the community I reside in has put my blogging in jeopardy. People said, "what if someone finds out you are writing about the school?" I'm not doing in anything wrong and I am certainly abiding by FERPA. My goal is not to write a gossip column and I'm not uploading my words onto the school website for all to speculate about who or what I'm talking about. My goal is, and always has been, to write about small town teaching and student teaching. I believe that we write best about what we care most about; this is it for me.
A few weeks after The Pledge was resurrected a teacher approached me and asked if I knew how the morning ritual resurfaced. At this point I was still weary of more retaliation and mentioned that it was the student's idea. I tried to gauge the reaction, but the inquisitive look left me unsure of what she was thinking. As the conversation continued I found out that only one classroom wasn't participating in reciting The Pledge because they didn't believe in it. Inside my heart sunk, but I kept a blank look on my face. I came to find out that the first period teacher told the students that they are being brainwashed by the government to recite The Pledge and they wholeheartedly believe it. Outrageous. It is true that I did not require any of the students to take part in this morning ritual, but my hopes were they would come to a conclusion on their own. It's funny...I get reprimanded for encouraging students and writing about it, but a teacher can spout their political views to students and no one cares. Is this the true face of education?
So, I'm back. I can't keep quiet. I won't go on pretending that every school system is perfect and there is nothing interesting to write about. So many people want change, but they don't want to hear about what needs changed or how it will happen. Read my blog if you want to hear about the triumphs and tribulations of entering into a volatile world of education, but if you can't accept or handle what I so passionately have to say then stop reading right now.
I haven't posted for a while, but I've kept a journal of all the crazy-wonderful-completely-ridiculous and horrifyingly-spectacular experience I've had so far. I am in my final two weeks of student teaching, but I will revisit the last 6 weeks and share with you what I've learned, struggled with, and hope to take away from this crazy experience...an experience that I plan on lasting for...oh, another 30 years or so.
Friday, September 30, 2011
Flash Mob: The Pledge of Allegiance
They were only five or six years old when the Twin Towers collapsed. The tragedy that occurred on September 11, 2001 is a faded memory for a few, but most learned about that day from their history teacher. Their knowledge gives them the insight needed to form opinions and make judgments, and their innocence provides their faith. The graduating class of 2014, now sophomores in high school, shocked and awed me this week with their blazing patriotism and pride for The United States.
Although cases against The Pledge of Allegiance still arise in our country every year, most schools recite this declaration at the beginning of the school day. It is a routine that is engrained in our youth at the start of the very first day of school. Unfortunately, reciting The Pledge of Allegiance was a practice that fell by the wayside at the beginning of the school year. It was casually mentioned to me one day by my cooperating teacher, but she pushed it off as an “oh well I guess we’re not taking the time this year” statement. I was shocked, but didn’t feel that I had the authority to protest my strong feelings in favor of The Pledge. There wasn’t a reason given, but I felt the creeping feelings that some felt that the 30 seconds of time taken to address the red, white, and blue flag in the hall was better used as teaching time; perhaps it is just laziness. Whatever the reason, it is not my job to speculate.
Wednesday morning started out as every morning had since I took over teaching the first period sophomore English class: bell rang, students chatted quietly in their seats, and I took attendance, lunch count, and breakfast count. As I began to point their attention to the whiteboard for our usual bell-ringer activity (think quick write activity) a naturally kind and thoughtful girl asked why we no longer said The Pledge. Before I spoke, I paused and considered the question that I was embarrassed to answer. Other students began to chime in asking the same question and within a moment an excitement took over the class. They looked to me as though I had the answer, or else I was going to lead them to battle. I decided to skip the question and tell them that I support their desire to rally around the flag each morning and recite our faith in America. It was then decided that we would continue the tradition and meet outside of our classroom door as soon as the next morning’s bell rang.
The event that happened that morning gave me my first taste of excitement and pride while teaching; and later brought tears to my eyes as I reflected upon it. Too often I hear our country’s youth put down for their ignorance, or careless attitude towards The United States. I am constantly disappointed in my adult peers who discredit our youth and label them as hopeless. If I don’t value their thoughts, passions, and ideas then who will? I believe in my students and I believe in them even more when they don’t believe in themselves.
The next morning I anticipated the flash mob Pledge of Allegiance that was to soon take place. It was a secret I shared with my students and as I passed them in the hallway we shared a smug and knowing smile. I had morning-duty before class and when the bell rang I swiftly made my way to the English room; only to find that my students were already waiting inside the doorway with huge grins on their face. When the second bell rang we stepped out into the hallway to find that the eighth graders were locked out of the Math room. We quickly whispered the plan to them and began to recite The Pledge. It was amazing to see our flash mob take over the upstairs of the school and draw out student and surprised educators from their rooms. The students were proud…of themselves, of their school, and of their country. I can’t teach my students how to be proud of their country, community, or classroom, but I can be supportive when they decide that they have been called to action to defend an issue or perpetuate a cause.
Today, day two of The Pledge, we lined up outside and proudly recited the words. There weren’t as many participants, but those who were still looming in the hall paused and joined our simple cause. By the time we completed the last word many more had begun to join us, realizing they were too late. My sophomores bounded back into our room with the same grins as before plastered on their face while I once again had tears welling in my eyes. The elation I feel for them is unexplainable. Some may consider this a small victory, but if a small victory happens once a day, even once a week, I’ll be happy. In fact, I’ll be proud. These students have known war for the majority of their lives, but their patriotism has not wavered. They’ve harbored the verbal abuse of others, but still they stand strong in their beliefs. It is times like this where I want to run to the mountaintop and shout to the world below. Teaching and writing are my mountaintops.
Thursday, September 15, 2011
Junior High
Since day three of student teaching I've had the pleasure (or perhaps sometimes the pain) of teaching eighth grade. As I have mentioned in previous posts I am working under three different cooperating teachers. Although this is not an ideal situation in some respects I have remained positive that gaining experience from three very different teachers will only aid my knowledge and abilities to be a great future teacher. Well, that's what I tell myself at least...
Being a student teacher is fabulous in so many ways, but it doesn't come without its problems. I feel the need to warn future student teachers that at times you feel completely out of place and wonder if you'll ever convince the students to buy into you as a legitimate educator. Each of my five classes have their own dynamics that I'm learning to understand and figure out how to tweak my methods to harness the uniqueness of each class in order to capture their attention. Easier said than done. Out of all of the classes I believe that junior high is the most unique...okay, their slightly crazy, but crazy in every wonderful, often inspiring, keep-you-on-your-toes, just like they should be type of way.
I didn't expect to take over a class on day 3 of the school year, but felt at the time that the opportunity was one that I should seize and take advantage of. The CT for eighth grade also serves as the first grade teacher for the first half of the day, as well as the librarian, elementary computer teacher, and elementary library teacher. Phew! When working in a rural school it is insisted upon that each teacher wears many hats and is able to multitask. Still, I think I'd like to work in a small school and am ready for the challenge that it brings. The CT has 30 or more years of teaching experience and I'm sure that I can learn a plethora of methods for both teaching and managing a classroom, unfortunately this particular elementary certified CT doesn't want to teach junior high. In fact, on day three she said to me, "I never wanted to teach high school and that's why I'm not a high school teacher." I shook my head to let her know that I understood and volunteered that junior high is my area of special interest and I would be as much help as she would like me to be. In my mind I began to empathize for the students and my heart silently broke because a teacher who feels no passion and has no interest in teaching can certainly influence the students...for the worse.
At first the class was being held in the library at a small table that only held six out of seven students, leaving one to sit at a nearby computer with little work space. The chairs had wheels that only fueled the students desire to constantly be in motion. I love junior high and all of the crazy-have-to-touch-my neighbor-at-all-times attitude that comes with the typically hyper students, but the environment was a tad bit ridiculous. A few days into teaching I worked out a different classroom arrangement and have since felt like I had a tad bit more control of typical teenage behavior. So, there I was one week into student teaching and was already planning lessons, unit, and basically everything the students would be doing until my time was up. My CT was around, but offered little insight into what I was teaching, or how I was teaching it. At times I felt as though she was just waiting for the school to take the eighth graders away from her so she could concentrate on her other classes. I began to wonder what the students thought about their situation and what effect switching teachers had on them, or if they even cared. As of now the students will be with me until the end of November and then the CT will take them back until mid-January. For the second semester of the school year they will be with my primary CT. I worry because I believe that students at this age are learning a lot and a lot is expected of them and will continue to be as they enter high school and so on. Plus, while they are in this time of transition they still need a sort of emotional attachment to their teacher. I hope I can connect with them and I believe that I can, but what happens when I leave?
Plainly put, my eighth grade classroom can often turn chaotic in a second. I do my best to "manage" behaviors and outbursts, but it doesn't come easy. These students were initially read a set of rules on the first day of class and really had no clue what was expected of them. After the holiday I introduced my own set of rules, consequences, grading system, and expectations. I believe that students need to know where they stand in a class and what is expected and it needs to be in writing. How can a teacher expect her students to perform and behave in a specific manner if they don't know how? Or, if it was only quietly told to them on day one? They can't and therefore they didn't. Since introducing my rules and speaking to the students about my desire for them to be successful has helped improve our classroom environment. Day by day it gets better.
Week three brought even more responsibilities when I added seventh grade to my plate, as well as sophomore English. I'm constantly planning, printing worksheets, grading, speaking with students, thinking about the future, attending staff meetings, and trying to cope with an online class as well as my student teaching portfolio. Phew! My days go by fast and I still am waking up excited to go to "work." Another challenge has been adapting to junior high and then changing my stride to high school. I wish I would have had the insight years ago to broaden my practice lesson planning to more than just grades 9-12. And, there are so many things I want to do with my students, but the ever growing list of standards, testing, and student absences make the fun projects difficult. It truly is a balancing act.
My primary CT has turned out to be a fabulous help. Many days she has stayed after school for hours to talk to me about students, situations, hypotheticals, my fears, and desires. I wish I could say that same for the eighth grade CT. Knowing that she really doesn't want to be in the class has also taken its tole on me. At times she acts as though the students are little demons! She will tell me that I am being too easy on the students, but doesn't offer ways to more strict and demanding. It's difficult when I am trying to control the classroom and she walks in , sits down, and interrupts with threats to the students. They are confused and I feel as though the authority has been taken from me. A student needs a teacher that he/she can trust and listen to. I'm trying to be that teacher even when it means calling out their misbehavior and letting them know that I am disappointed in them. However, when I don't have that opportunity and someone else is issuing detention threats I can't be the trustworthy teacher because I'm expected to carryout someone the demands of someone else. The best advice that I received about consequences came from my practicum teacher last semester when she said, "If you have rules then you need to have consequences; and whatever that consequence might be you need to be ready to issue it the first time. If you don't then you'll lose their respect and you may never get it back." I'm a believer.
A highlight of grade eight thus far has been the first big test. I was nervous for my students and afraid that a few of them would perform below average due to their inability to turn in their work. Last Thursday I gave them a 50 point vocabulary test that covered the unit vocabulary as well as commonly missed words from the beginning of the year diagnostic exam. I became elated as I graded the tests when I saw that they performed MUCH higher than I expected. In fact, 6 out of 7 students earned an A or A+ on the test. What did I learn from this you ask? For starters, have faith in your students until they given you reason to doubt it, but then keep trying anyway. Also, pick your battles with classroom behavior and how it may or may not reflect a students grades. So maybe a few students act out or seem to pay little attention while you are teaching...don't give up hope...especially not during the first few weeks.
This past Tuesday I had mini conferences with each student. I decided to review all of their grades, what they were great at and what I thought could use a little improvement. It was also a time for the students to tell me anything they needed to get off of their chest, what they liked and disliked about the class and me, and a time to find a common ground. I hoped they couldn't see the tears of excitement and joy that were building up in my eyes. Shortcomings and all, I really am proud of them and I do care about them. Conferencing with each student also gave me a time to ask about how their sports and hobbies were going and to share a little about myself with them. I really think a connection has been made, but realize that it is going to take a lot more work than one mini conference. I'm excited to see the eighth graders grown over the next two months and I hope that maybe I can visit again in the spring to see just how mature I know they will become.
I apologize for the delay in my blog posts and I'm trying to manage my schedule in a way that allows me to set aside a few moments each day to reflect in writing the amazing experience I am having. Aaron Yost, a former professor of mine from last semester encouraged me to keep writing throughout my teaching...to keep reflecting and living in the moment of educating young minds. I often consider the writing that I did for him and compare it to this mere blog and am disappointed in myself, but like I tell my students...you have to put the words down and have to start somewhere.
It just gets better all the time...
Being a student teacher is fabulous in so many ways, but it doesn't come without its problems. I feel the need to warn future student teachers that at times you feel completely out of place and wonder if you'll ever convince the students to buy into you as a legitimate educator. Each of my five classes have their own dynamics that I'm learning to understand and figure out how to tweak my methods to harness the uniqueness of each class in order to capture their attention. Easier said than done. Out of all of the classes I believe that junior high is the most unique...okay, their slightly crazy, but crazy in every wonderful, often inspiring, keep-you-on-your-toes, just like they should be type of way.
I didn't expect to take over a class on day 3 of the school year, but felt at the time that the opportunity was one that I should seize and take advantage of. The CT for eighth grade also serves as the first grade teacher for the first half of the day, as well as the librarian, elementary computer teacher, and elementary library teacher. Phew! When working in a rural school it is insisted upon that each teacher wears many hats and is able to multitask. Still, I think I'd like to work in a small school and am ready for the challenge that it brings. The CT has 30 or more years of teaching experience and I'm sure that I can learn a plethora of methods for both teaching and managing a classroom, unfortunately this particular elementary certified CT doesn't want to teach junior high. In fact, on day three she said to me, "I never wanted to teach high school and that's why I'm not a high school teacher." I shook my head to let her know that I understood and volunteered that junior high is my area of special interest and I would be as much help as she would like me to be. In my mind I began to empathize for the students and my heart silently broke because a teacher who feels no passion and has no interest in teaching can certainly influence the students...for the worse.
At first the class was being held in the library at a small table that only held six out of seven students, leaving one to sit at a nearby computer with little work space. The chairs had wheels that only fueled the students desire to constantly be in motion. I love junior high and all of the crazy-have-to-touch-my neighbor-at-all-times attitude that comes with the typically hyper students, but the environment was a tad bit ridiculous. A few days into teaching I worked out a different classroom arrangement and have since felt like I had a tad bit more control of typical teenage behavior. So, there I was one week into student teaching and was already planning lessons, unit, and basically everything the students would be doing until my time was up. My CT was around, but offered little insight into what I was teaching, or how I was teaching it. At times I felt as though she was just waiting for the school to take the eighth graders away from her so she could concentrate on her other classes. I began to wonder what the students thought about their situation and what effect switching teachers had on them, or if they even cared. As of now the students will be with me until the end of November and then the CT will take them back until mid-January. For the second semester of the school year they will be with my primary CT. I worry because I believe that students at this age are learning a lot and a lot is expected of them and will continue to be as they enter high school and so on. Plus, while they are in this time of transition they still need a sort of emotional attachment to their teacher. I hope I can connect with them and I believe that I can, but what happens when I leave?
Plainly put, my eighth grade classroom can often turn chaotic in a second. I do my best to "manage" behaviors and outbursts, but it doesn't come easy. These students were initially read a set of rules on the first day of class and really had no clue what was expected of them. After the holiday I introduced my own set of rules, consequences, grading system, and expectations. I believe that students need to know where they stand in a class and what is expected and it needs to be in writing. How can a teacher expect her students to perform and behave in a specific manner if they don't know how? Or, if it was only quietly told to them on day one? They can't and therefore they didn't. Since introducing my rules and speaking to the students about my desire for them to be successful has helped improve our classroom environment. Day by day it gets better.
Week three brought even more responsibilities when I added seventh grade to my plate, as well as sophomore English. I'm constantly planning, printing worksheets, grading, speaking with students, thinking about the future, attending staff meetings, and trying to cope with an online class as well as my student teaching portfolio. Phew! My days go by fast and I still am waking up excited to go to "work." Another challenge has been adapting to junior high and then changing my stride to high school. I wish I would have had the insight years ago to broaden my practice lesson planning to more than just grades 9-12. And, there are so many things I want to do with my students, but the ever growing list of standards, testing, and student absences make the fun projects difficult. It truly is a balancing act.
My primary CT has turned out to be a fabulous help. Many days she has stayed after school for hours to talk to me about students, situations, hypotheticals, my fears, and desires. I wish I could say that same for the eighth grade CT. Knowing that she really doesn't want to be in the class has also taken its tole on me. At times she acts as though the students are little demons! She will tell me that I am being too easy on the students, but doesn't offer ways to more strict and demanding. It's difficult when I am trying to control the classroom and she walks in , sits down, and interrupts with threats to the students. They are confused and I feel as though the authority has been taken from me. A student needs a teacher that he/she can trust and listen to. I'm trying to be that teacher even when it means calling out their misbehavior and letting them know that I am disappointed in them. However, when I don't have that opportunity and someone else is issuing detention threats I can't be the trustworthy teacher because I'm expected to carryout someone the demands of someone else. The best advice that I received about consequences came from my practicum teacher last semester when she said, "If you have rules then you need to have consequences; and whatever that consequence might be you need to be ready to issue it the first time. If you don't then you'll lose their respect and you may never get it back." I'm a believer.
A highlight of grade eight thus far has been the first big test. I was nervous for my students and afraid that a few of them would perform below average due to their inability to turn in their work. Last Thursday I gave them a 50 point vocabulary test that covered the unit vocabulary as well as commonly missed words from the beginning of the year diagnostic exam. I became elated as I graded the tests when I saw that they performed MUCH higher than I expected. In fact, 6 out of 7 students earned an A or A+ on the test. What did I learn from this you ask? For starters, have faith in your students until they given you reason to doubt it, but then keep trying anyway. Also, pick your battles with classroom behavior and how it may or may not reflect a students grades. So maybe a few students act out or seem to pay little attention while you are teaching...don't give up hope...especially not during the first few weeks.
This past Tuesday I had mini conferences with each student. I decided to review all of their grades, what they were great at and what I thought could use a little improvement. It was also a time for the students to tell me anything they needed to get off of their chest, what they liked and disliked about the class and me, and a time to find a common ground. I hoped they couldn't see the tears of excitement and joy that were building up in my eyes. Shortcomings and all, I really am proud of them and I do care about them. Conferencing with each student also gave me a time to ask about how their sports and hobbies were going and to share a little about myself with them. I really think a connection has been made, but realize that it is going to take a lot more work than one mini conference. I'm excited to see the eighth graders grown over the next two months and I hope that maybe I can visit again in the spring to see just how mature I know they will become.
I apologize for the delay in my blog posts and I'm trying to manage my schedule in a way that allows me to set aside a few moments each day to reflect in writing the amazing experience I am having. Aaron Yost, a former professor of mine from last semester encouraged me to keep writing throughout my teaching...to keep reflecting and living in the moment of educating young minds. I often consider the writing that I did for him and compare it to this mere blog and am disappointed in myself, but like I tell my students...you have to put the words down and have to start somewhere.
It just gets better all the time...
Monday, September 5, 2011
Breathlessly Wild
I've spent the holiday weekend reflecting on my second week of teaching and a warm, satisfying feeling has come over me. I've thought a lot about the teacher that I am today and the teacher that I want to be in the future, but what has really stayed present in my mind is my students. Let's forget about the curriculum, the lessons, the tests, the assignments, and etc...because what it all boils down to is the students. In response to my post about the first week of school a former high school teacher-extraordinaire of mine took the time to write me a message. The following is an excerpt I'd like to share with you:
Sometimes it gets so frustrating that you think you should just quit and be a bartender. But, there'll be days that fill your heart with joy at what happens. So, fight through these tough times and know that things will get better, worse, more fun, less exiting, boring, breathlessly wild, full of tears, and full of smiles.
If those words aren't inspiration I don't know what are. They bring a tear to my eye and I feel excitement just thinking about it, especially because this teacher really is the best teacher in the world. Just this year he began his 40th year of teaching and still has spring in his academic step. Looking back into my memory I wonder what I was like when I was the same age as my students are now. Admittedly, I was not always the best student, but managed above average grades and excelling in other areas. Don't get me wrong, I wasn't a bad student and worked for my teachers while causing little headaches, but I surely wasn't the student I am now. Why is that? Some may say it's age and maturity, situation, environment, or that I was just bored and consumed by the life of a teenager. I really don't know, but I do know that this teacher liked me anyway.
He liked me anyway...and that is something that I've been trying to remember while I interact with students. When I'm frustrated and feel myself getting upset I try to pull out the "like them anyway" card I've been carrying in my back pocket because sadly, not all teachers have that card. When I hear the other educators in my school discussing a student and it sounds like they are already going to write them off in the second week I remain quiet and make a mental note to say hello to the student the next day and give them encouragement and praise for no other reason than because they deserve it.
Teaching is so "breathlessly wild" because in no other profession can you experience so many emotions in one day while interacting with great minds-the minds of our children. Student teachers should expect some disappointments in the first few weeks, but going into it all I didn't believe I'd feel anything other than sincere happiness and gratitude. In his message, my former teacher also mentioned that if you stay with it then one day a student will walk into your classroom and will make it all worth while. Maybe I've already met that student, or maybe it will take another 20 years to meet him or her, but I'm pretty sure that the student that walks in my classroom to make it all worth my while has been entering it every day for the last 2 weeks and I just have to remember to take notice. No one ever said it would be easy, but they did say it would be worth it and that I believe.
Sometimes it gets so frustrating that you think you should just quit and be a bartender. But, there'll be days that fill your heart with joy at what happens. So, fight through these tough times and know that things will get better, worse, more fun, less exiting, boring, breathlessly wild, full of tears, and full of smiles.
If those words aren't inspiration I don't know what are. They bring a tear to my eye and I feel excitement just thinking about it, especially because this teacher really is the best teacher in the world. Just this year he began his 40th year of teaching and still has spring in his academic step. Looking back into my memory I wonder what I was like when I was the same age as my students are now. Admittedly, I was not always the best student, but managed above average grades and excelling in other areas. Don't get me wrong, I wasn't a bad student and worked for my teachers while causing little headaches, but I surely wasn't the student I am now. Why is that? Some may say it's age and maturity, situation, environment, or that I was just bored and consumed by the life of a teenager. I really don't know, but I do know that this teacher liked me anyway.
He liked me anyway...and that is something that I've been trying to remember while I interact with students. When I'm frustrated and feel myself getting upset I try to pull out the "like them anyway" card I've been carrying in my back pocket because sadly, not all teachers have that card. When I hear the other educators in my school discussing a student and it sounds like they are already going to write them off in the second week I remain quiet and make a mental note to say hello to the student the next day and give them encouragement and praise for no other reason than because they deserve it.
Teaching is so "breathlessly wild" because in no other profession can you experience so many emotions in one day while interacting with great minds-the minds of our children. Student teachers should expect some disappointments in the first few weeks, but going into it all I didn't believe I'd feel anything other than sincere happiness and gratitude. In his message, my former teacher also mentioned that if you stay with it then one day a student will walk into your classroom and will make it all worth while. Maybe I've already met that student, or maybe it will take another 20 years to meet him or her, but I'm pretty sure that the student that walks in my classroom to make it all worth my while has been entering it every day for the last 2 weeks and I just have to remember to take notice. No one ever said it would be easy, but they did say it would be worth it and that I believe.
Thursday, September 1, 2011
The First Week
Never again will I fault any of my teachers or professors for not returning my assignments in a "timely manner" because as it turns out, they really are busy! By nature I am a "planner" and live just to write tasks in my schedule book just so I can cross them off (well, and to accomplish them of course), but sometimes there just isn't enough time in the day. I apologize for the extremely delayed detailing of my first week as a student teacher and thank you to everyone who has approached me to tell me that they are following along. Hearing the voice or reading the words of someone whom I never thought would read my tiny teaching blog is extremely rewarding and reminds me that my students now and in the future just might actually be listening to what I say. Inspiring!
Overall, my first week was filled with peaks and valleys and the journey through the first five days allowed me to experience typical teacher duties and new emotions about myself as a teacher-to-be. I arrived to the school at 7:45am Monday morning, only to find that I was the first to arrive, so naturally I wandered around awkwardly looking for a familiar face. Eventually the principal found me and invited me to breakfast and introduced me to the staff as they slowly arrived. I'm slightly awkward in everyday life, but nerves coupled with a new environment all while trying to put on my best teacher face was slightly overwhelming. Finally, I turned off the ongoing narration in my head and settled into the morning. Both Monday and Tuesday were designed to allow the teachers time in their classroom, as well as meetings to review handbook changes, insurance, new teacher information, CPR training, and every little bit of information that one might need to know before students arrive. The days were long, but peaceful and I was able to get what I believed to be a firm grasp on the school and what to expect. On Tuesday, the principal (also Superintendent), Bonnie, cooked a hearty breakfast and we all eased into the day. Little did I know that it was the calm before the storm.
I finally was able to sit down with my CT and begin to review what her curriculum expectations were for the year, or at least the four months that I would be interning in her classroom. I'll admit that I was a little more than disappointed when it became apparent that while everything was mapped out in her mind, it wasn't on paper and she wasn't clearly communicating with me her plans. Remember, I'm a planner and the possibility that I'd be the apprentice of a non-planner was semi-devastating. (Okay, that is a bit of a dramatic remark) Essentially, I left the last day of PIR knowing only as much as the students knew and I had already been in school for two days. (score: CT-1, me-0...but whose keeping score) And thus began my mental battle of wondering what I should ask of my CT, and when I should keep my mouth closed.
As usual, Tuesday night found me with back-to-school jitters while I picked out the following days attire. What has always been unusual to me is the level of casual dress that is acceptable in the west. Do I dress up, or simply dress "nice" for Montana standards. I didn't want to be over or under dressed, but then decided to pick something out and call it quits while chalking up my indecisiveness to first-day jitters. The next morning arrived quickly and before I knew it I was standing in front of the school with the CT monitoring the students as they ate breakfast, gave shy smiles to their classmates, and made their way into the school as the bell rang. The day started off with a school wide assembly (77 students) to introduce all the teachers (even little ol' me) and cover any changes in the handbooks. Teaching at a rural school is exciting because there is a sense of pride and excitement that appears almost innate in the students that I don't believe always happens in bigger schools. When the principal introduced me to the student body my name was met with wild applause, foot stomping on the bleachers, and a heard of tony elementary students running over to high-five me; it was the warmest welcome I've ever received.
Unfortunately, the excitement of the first week came to a screeching halt after the meeting. I knew going into this experience that not every day would be filled with inspiring young minds to achieve the greater good, but never did I imagine I'd experience the pain of boredom. Even worse, I felt like a high school student. No, it wasn't that I blended in among the students leading me to feel out of place, but I actually felt like I was being treated like a student. For days I sat amongst the actual students and paid attention to the reading of rules, beginning lessons, and discussion, but I wasn't allowed to participate. I was fuming inside and constantly had to calm my inner teacher. Is it wrong that I'm eager to teach and feel that the 90 hours of observation I put in last semester are enough quiet reflection? Slowly the boredom ate away at my mind and I began concocting reasons as to why I should not endure such a punishment and how I would fight against the student teaching gods in academia...Sheesh, I get carried away so easily. I suppose that in the end all I was desiring was a small bit of recognition and a place of my own. Unbeknownst to my CT, I needed to be introduced to the students and I was desiring for her to ask them to introduce themselves to me. I predict that it is difficult to be a new teacher (just like a new student) in a rural school because everyone already knows everyone and it's easy to forget about the newbies.
The days of the first week dragged on and I found myself becoming very picky about the methods my CT used to educate her class. This my friends is where a new student teacher can get into trouble. So, you think you're smart, that maybe even you were born to be a teacher, and you can clearly visualize yourself with your own classroom and several students who admire their favorite English teacher...just because you feel that way it is not a reason to actually verbalize it. Instead, take notes about what is happening and how you would do it differently if presented with a similar scenario. The first meaningful note I scrawled was to "read the worksheet directions before you pass it out to your students." It sounds simple enough, but I know we've all had, or witnessed, teachers who pass out a worksheet or administer a test and when confronted with a question about the material look at it as if it were the first time they've ever laid eyes on it. Maybe it is. I say if you haven't had time to refresh your memory about the worksheet/project/test/etc...then while you are passing it out read the direction to your students. That way both you and the class have heard the directions at least once before answers are given or interpretation questions are asked.
Finally it was Friday and I had survived a whole week (well 3 days with students). I entered the school with my head held high and ready to submerge myself into the fine world of education. The first two periods started off smoothly and I was even asked to assist a class of Seniors with the introduction to Anglo-Saxon literature. (I realize that all of you non-English-nerdies aren't quite as excited as my fellow E-peers) By third period things started going down hill...fast! The seventh graders couldn't sit still, keep their hands to themselves, or stay on topic. Since there are only 3 students every action is noticed and commented on by the teacher. At one point I again felt like a student (I haven't been in seventh grade for 17 years!) when the teacher was angry enough to ask me to sit in between to misbehaving boys, all the while lecturing about inappropriate behavior. It was then that I decided a student teacher needs to suck it up for at least the first week. My lovely rural school hasn't had a student teacher in an unmentionable amount of years and it is only natural that not a sole would know what to do with me. I decided that all of the pain and boredom I experienced was for the greater good and simply put I needed to suck it up and relax over the weekend. I felt good about my change of heart and that's when seventh period began.
I didn't expect to have a boy cry in my eighth grade English class. Oh yes, you read that right...a tearful eighth grader during the last period of the day. I should probably back up a moment and say that while my main CT teaches 9-12, I am also student teaching eighth grade English under Mrs. B (who also happens to teach half a day of first grade, is the librarian and elementary computer teacher, as well as eighth grade English). And, I am teaching seventh grade English under Mrs. G who happens to also teach grades 4-6. Yup, 5 different grades and 3 different teachers. Mrs. B is a little on the frazzled side, so I'm going to chalk my little eighth grade buddy shedding some tears on her reaction and his bad day. All in all, it was quite the week.
Overall, my first week was filled with peaks and valleys and the journey through the first five days allowed me to experience typical teacher duties and new emotions about myself as a teacher-to-be. I arrived to the school at 7:45am Monday morning, only to find that I was the first to arrive, so naturally I wandered around awkwardly looking for a familiar face. Eventually the principal found me and invited me to breakfast and introduced me to the staff as they slowly arrived. I'm slightly awkward in everyday life, but nerves coupled with a new environment all while trying to put on my best teacher face was slightly overwhelming. Finally, I turned off the ongoing narration in my head and settled into the morning. Both Monday and Tuesday were designed to allow the teachers time in their classroom, as well as meetings to review handbook changes, insurance, new teacher information, CPR training, and every little bit of information that one might need to know before students arrive. The days were long, but peaceful and I was able to get what I believed to be a firm grasp on the school and what to expect. On Tuesday, the principal (also Superintendent), Bonnie, cooked a hearty breakfast and we all eased into the day. Little did I know that it was the calm before the storm.
I finally was able to sit down with my CT and begin to review what her curriculum expectations were for the year, or at least the four months that I would be interning in her classroom. I'll admit that I was a little more than disappointed when it became apparent that while everything was mapped out in her mind, it wasn't on paper and she wasn't clearly communicating with me her plans. Remember, I'm a planner and the possibility that I'd be the apprentice of a non-planner was semi-devastating. (Okay, that is a bit of a dramatic remark) Essentially, I left the last day of PIR knowing only as much as the students knew and I had already been in school for two days. (score: CT-1, me-0...but whose keeping score) And thus began my mental battle of wondering what I should ask of my CT, and when I should keep my mouth closed.
As usual, Tuesday night found me with back-to-school jitters while I picked out the following days attire. What has always been unusual to me is the level of casual dress that is acceptable in the west. Do I dress up, or simply dress "nice" for Montana standards. I didn't want to be over or under dressed, but then decided to pick something out and call it quits while chalking up my indecisiveness to first-day jitters. The next morning arrived quickly and before I knew it I was standing in front of the school with the CT monitoring the students as they ate breakfast, gave shy smiles to their classmates, and made their way into the school as the bell rang. The day started off with a school wide assembly (77 students) to introduce all the teachers (even little ol' me) and cover any changes in the handbooks. Teaching at a rural school is exciting because there is a sense of pride and excitement that appears almost innate in the students that I don't believe always happens in bigger schools. When the principal introduced me to the student body my name was met with wild applause, foot stomping on the bleachers, and a heard of tony elementary students running over to high-five me; it was the warmest welcome I've ever received.
Unfortunately, the excitement of the first week came to a screeching halt after the meeting. I knew going into this experience that not every day would be filled with inspiring young minds to achieve the greater good, but never did I imagine I'd experience the pain of boredom. Even worse, I felt like a high school student. No, it wasn't that I blended in among the students leading me to feel out of place, but I actually felt like I was being treated like a student. For days I sat amongst the actual students and paid attention to the reading of rules, beginning lessons, and discussion, but I wasn't allowed to participate. I was fuming inside and constantly had to calm my inner teacher. Is it wrong that I'm eager to teach and feel that the 90 hours of observation I put in last semester are enough quiet reflection? Slowly the boredom ate away at my mind and I began concocting reasons as to why I should not endure such a punishment and how I would fight against the student teaching gods in academia...Sheesh, I get carried away so easily. I suppose that in the end all I was desiring was a small bit of recognition and a place of my own. Unbeknownst to my CT, I needed to be introduced to the students and I was desiring for her to ask them to introduce themselves to me. I predict that it is difficult to be a new teacher (just like a new student) in a rural school because everyone already knows everyone and it's easy to forget about the newbies.
The days of the first week dragged on and I found myself becoming very picky about the methods my CT used to educate her class. This my friends is where a new student teacher can get into trouble. So, you think you're smart, that maybe even you were born to be a teacher, and you can clearly visualize yourself with your own classroom and several students who admire their favorite English teacher...just because you feel that way it is not a reason to actually verbalize it. Instead, take notes about what is happening and how you would do it differently if presented with a similar scenario. The first meaningful note I scrawled was to "read the worksheet directions before you pass it out to your students." It sounds simple enough, but I know we've all had, or witnessed, teachers who pass out a worksheet or administer a test and when confronted with a question about the material look at it as if it were the first time they've ever laid eyes on it. Maybe it is. I say if you haven't had time to refresh your memory about the worksheet/project/test/etc...then while you are passing it out read the direction to your students. That way both you and the class have heard the directions at least once before answers are given or interpretation questions are asked.
Finally it was Friday and I had survived a whole week (well 3 days with students). I entered the school with my head held high and ready to submerge myself into the fine world of education. The first two periods started off smoothly and I was even asked to assist a class of Seniors with the introduction to Anglo-Saxon literature. (I realize that all of you non-English-nerdies aren't quite as excited as my fellow E-peers) By third period things started going down hill...fast! The seventh graders couldn't sit still, keep their hands to themselves, or stay on topic. Since there are only 3 students every action is noticed and commented on by the teacher. At one point I again felt like a student (I haven't been in seventh grade for 17 years!) when the teacher was angry enough to ask me to sit in between to misbehaving boys, all the while lecturing about inappropriate behavior. It was then that I decided a student teacher needs to suck it up for at least the first week. My lovely rural school hasn't had a student teacher in an unmentionable amount of years and it is only natural that not a sole would know what to do with me. I decided that all of the pain and boredom I experienced was for the greater good and simply put I needed to suck it up and relax over the weekend. I felt good about my change of heart and that's when seventh period began.
I didn't expect to have a boy cry in my eighth grade English class. Oh yes, you read that right...a tearful eighth grader during the last period of the day. I should probably back up a moment and say that while my main CT teaches 9-12, I am also student teaching eighth grade English under Mrs. B (who also happens to teach half a day of first grade, is the librarian and elementary computer teacher, as well as eighth grade English). And, I am teaching seventh grade English under Mrs. G who happens to also teach grades 4-6. Yup, 5 different grades and 3 different teachers. Mrs. B is a little on the frazzled side, so I'm going to chalk my little eighth grade buddy shedding some tears on her reaction and his bad day. All in all, it was quite the week.
Friday, August 26, 2011
It's Only the Beginning...
As you can see (hopefully), it is a crossword puzzle with the word,s Welcome Back, English, Spanish, and Schumacher (for the name of my CT) hidden in the puzzle. I was fortunate to receive multitudes of ideas from fellow teachers from across the country. (THANK YOU!) In the end, I chose this simple design for the small bulletin board in beside the doorway. However, I'm still working on creating a longer-lasting board that is across the hall from my little piece of educational heaven. I hope to create an interactive board that every student in the high school can participate in. (all 25 of them!)
Today is Friday! The week went fast, but admittedly dragged by during several hours. I think because I am still eager to start actual teaching that I at times feel as though seconds are crawling because I'm envious of the busy schedule my CT keeps. Although I know in good time that prized schedule will soon be mine. Please check back in with my blog this weekend for a full update of my adventures as the rural school teacher.
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
Everyday Inspirations
Two of my friends over in Kent, Ohio (hi Ryan and Amy) grow beautiful and delicious gardens. To my delight they often shared their vegetables and let me sit among their gorgeous and scent-pleasing flowers. Both have often told me about their gardens and the satisfaction they receive from spending time in the dirt and watching their hard work grow. Today I found myself digging weeds from my single flower bed while cursing myself for not paying more attention to the quickly escalating problem. It wasn't long though before my mind set into a more meditative state and as I pulled the weeds from the dry Montana dirt I began to see how a garden parallels so many other areas in our lives.
Ryan and Amy, both different and wonderfully inspiring people, create similar produce, but fashion their gardens as they see fit. However, they can both agree that like many areas in our lives, if not all, take time, dedication, and planning. I dug my nails under the roots of my weed-bed and began to think about what this mass of chaos was teaching me. Recently I read a response to a sad news story about two young adults losing their lives because of a fatal decision to race their vehicles. In his/her post the responder lectured whoever was reading about how today's youth live without knowing respect for themselves, or others, and that they haven't been taught how to be "good" people. Whenever I read comments about how troubled our youth are, or how they lack any real skill to benefit our world my heart sinks and my gut rages. I think of all the youth that are spending their energy doing wonderful things for their families, schools, and community right here in the Gallatin Valley. I think about the people who put our future leaders down as though all adolescence have nothing to offer the world; and then I have to wonder if the responder has ever taught anyone anything, especially about respect. Just when I thought my flower bed was too messy and the soil was too dry I found a worm and I knew that among the mess something beautiful could still grow if I simply took the time to care about it.
It isn't only teachers that teach, or parents that nurture, doctors that heal, and farmers that grow...we are all responsible for teaching. What are you teaching the people around you, young and old, when you make everyday decisions? I often think about the teacher I want to be, and forget about the teacher that I am. I feel pity in my heart for those who don't believe in our youth, and maybe even in their own children. It spurs that unexplainable desire I've harbored for years to step into the classroom because I believe it is where I will make the most positive impact. Last semester my cooperating teacher for my practicum experience told me that 10% of what she is teaching her students is English, and the other 90% is about life.
Who knew that the task I loathe the most could produce such incredible thought and revelations about the bigger picture of life? Seeing the worm wiggle through the soil reminded me even among the bleakest environments all hope is not lost and change is possible.
What are you teaching those around you today?
Ryan and Amy, both different and wonderfully inspiring people, create similar produce, but fashion their gardens as they see fit. However, they can both agree that like many areas in our lives, if not all, take time, dedication, and planning. I dug my nails under the roots of my weed-bed and began to think about what this mass of chaos was teaching me. Recently I read a response to a sad news story about two young adults losing their lives because of a fatal decision to race their vehicles. In his/her post the responder lectured whoever was reading about how today's youth live without knowing respect for themselves, or others, and that they haven't been taught how to be "good" people. Whenever I read comments about how troubled our youth are, or how they lack any real skill to benefit our world my heart sinks and my gut rages. I think of all the youth that are spending their energy doing wonderful things for their families, schools, and community right here in the Gallatin Valley. I think about the people who put our future leaders down as though all adolescence have nothing to offer the world; and then I have to wonder if the responder has ever taught anyone anything, especially about respect. Just when I thought my flower bed was too messy and the soil was too dry I found a worm and I knew that among the mess something beautiful could still grow if I simply took the time to care about it.
It isn't only teachers that teach, or parents that nurture, doctors that heal, and farmers that grow...we are all responsible for teaching. What are you teaching the people around you, young and old, when you make everyday decisions? I often think about the teacher I want to be, and forget about the teacher that I am. I feel pity in my heart for those who don't believe in our youth, and maybe even in their own children. It spurs that unexplainable desire I've harbored for years to step into the classroom because I believe it is where I will make the most positive impact. Last semester my cooperating teacher for my practicum experience told me that 10% of what she is teaching her students is English, and the other 90% is about life.
Who knew that the task I loathe the most could produce such incredible thought and revelations about the bigger picture of life? Seeing the worm wiggle through the soil reminded me even among the bleakest environments all hope is not lost and change is possible.
What are you teaching those around you today?
Sunday, August 14, 2011
The Final Countdown...
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| Bannack, Montana Photo Courtesy of Trisha Jones Photography |
I've had the opportunity to visit my new school and speak with the staff, high school teachers, and most importantly my cooperating teaching. Just last week the superintendent/principal/teacher (remember I'm at a small rural school) armed me with teacher and student handbooks, my class schedule, a printout of my students' information, and a trip to my future classroom. I'm grateful for all of the information, but I must admit that something is missing...and I'm afraid it is my confidence. Sure, I've breezed through lesson plans, unit plans, in-class teaching to peers, a million pages of reading, and even a practicum experience where I was allowed to practice my teacher-magic on real live specimens (teenagers), but this student teaching business is different.
Admittedly, I am nervous about my relationship with my cooperating teaching. At first I thought, how could she not love me? I'm eager, excited, mature, knowledgeable, and perhaps most importantly, passionate, but what if that isn't enough? Or, what if she decides that she doesn't want someone marching into her classroom and shaking things up? In all of their wisdom and kindness my professors tell me to not worry and just be my rockin teacher self (in so many words) and that I can't possibly fail, but let's face it...we've all heard horror stories of how student teaching has gone terribly wrong.
In my communications to my CT (cooperating teacher) I have tried to be mindful of her busy schedule, but all the while I'm obsessively checking my email hoping to find a response that will enlighten me of the ways of the teacher. After two weeks of waiting I finally received my first response (this began last May) and was slightly disappointed. Very little information was given to me and I chalked it up to "end of the year craziness" all the while slightly lowering my expectations. A very prescribed method of how to appropriately contact your CT was bestowed upon my brain while at MSU, but clearly such a prescription doesn't always give accurate results. What should I expect from my CT, even in the early stages?
I was invited to attend the end of the year teacher days (PIR days) in June shortly after school was dismissed for summer break and jumped at the chance to be involved in "real teacher duties." This would also hopefully allow me the opportunity to meet my CT and pick her brain as to how I can use the summer to prepare for the upcoming school year. There were many items on the agenda those few days and in the end I only received a hodge-podge of information and a promise that I would get an all-telling email later in the summer. Patiently I waited, but as my fellow English Education peers received their placements and then curriculum outlines I began to wonder just who my CT is. So, I'm not overly prepared for student teaching, but is that as big of a deal as my nervous-excited-semi-freaking-out gut tells me? I've spent years, if not my entire life preparing for this by not only attending classes, but reading and reflecting.
Student teachers can't expect their CT's to be mind readers, or to drop what their doing to go over every detail of how they run their classrooms and day-to-day activities. I'm prepared, but not over-prepared. In some ways the unknowing is a clever disguise for keeping me on my toes and ready for what happens, and not what I've prepared to happen. In upcoming blog entries I will continue to explore the ST-CT relationship and the coulda, shoulda, wouldas of preparing for this leg of the journey.
Saturday, August 13, 2011
Just Start Somewhere...
Write. Write everyday. Write anything. Write something. Just start writing. It's what we tell our students, and often what we tell ourselves. However, how often do we, the teacher, actually follow our own advice? Just getting this blog up and running was a struggle that I didn't anticipate, but I am soon going to expect my students to anticipate deadlines, research challenges, "writer's block" and a plethora of other obstacles that may get in their way of crafting the perfect piece of writing.
Perhaps I should back up a little now that I've gotten the first few words down. This is my first blog entry of what I hope to be many that chronicle my days as a student teacher; and then hopefully employed first year teacher. Throughout my education at Montana State University I was exposed to many different publications about student teaching, but none that I felt gave an intimate look into the daily occurrences of the teaching profession. Last fall my professor Lisa Eckert casually suggested that it wouldn't be a far stretch for any of her students to pursue writing such a piece of literature; so here goes my attempt!
And now a little about me... I'm a 29 year old student teacher and finishing my last semester at Montana State. I grew up in Northeast Ohio somewhere between Cleveland, football, and farms. My passion for reading started at an early age and a part of me always knew that I wanted to be a teacher, but it wasn't until I turned 25 and moved west did the fire ignite. Over the last two years I've spent my days juggling classes, part-time jobs, and a growing reading list. I've been fortunate to study under great minds such as Lisa Eckert, Rob Petrone, Aaron Yost, and Dr. Michael Sexson. (And, many more of course!)
On August 22 I will begin the final leg in my journey as college student, but only begin another long and fulfilling chapter as a forever student and life-long learner. I welcome your comments, questions, criticisms
and hope that in some small (or big!) way my insights and experience can help you gain a closer look into the life of a teacher.
Here we go!
Perhaps I should back up a little now that I've gotten the first few words down. This is my first blog entry of what I hope to be many that chronicle my days as a student teacher; and then hopefully employed first year teacher. Throughout my education at Montana State University I was exposed to many different publications about student teaching, but none that I felt gave an intimate look into the daily occurrences of the teaching profession. Last fall my professor Lisa Eckert casually suggested that it wouldn't be a far stretch for any of her students to pursue writing such a piece of literature; so here goes my attempt!
And now a little about me... I'm a 29 year old student teacher and finishing my last semester at Montana State. I grew up in Northeast Ohio somewhere between Cleveland, football, and farms. My passion for reading started at an early age and a part of me always knew that I wanted to be a teacher, but it wasn't until I turned 25 and moved west did the fire ignite. Over the last two years I've spent my days juggling classes, part-time jobs, and a growing reading list. I've been fortunate to study under great minds such as Lisa Eckert, Rob Petrone, Aaron Yost, and Dr. Michael Sexson. (And, many more of course!)
On August 22 I will begin the final leg in my journey as college student, but only begin another long and fulfilling chapter as a forever student and life-long learner. I welcome your comments, questions, criticisms
and hope that in some small (or big!) way my insights and experience can help you gain a closer look into the life of a teacher.
Here we go!
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